We women need to be strong and brave. We have to be strong for our children, families and employers. We need to be strong to prove that we are not weak and uninteresting females, because a woman from the very definition is somebody who is weak, sentimental and a burden to the world. So we do anything to prove contrary.
I know many women who repeat to themselves: “I have to be strong, patient, kind and understanding. I am a brave girl and I will persevere”. And they do. They are afraid to give up in front of a mountain of tasks, keeping their moody children, demanding bosses, expectant parents or detached partners satisfied. And they have their own mantra: I will manage; I will show “them” that I can, that I am a good, worthy and valuable person.
I wonder what a brave and strong woman does really feel inside. When she tells herself to be strong, does she really feel weak, exhausted and fed up? When she has to be brave is she scared of a situation and people around her? What does she really feel when confronted with a naughty child, rude colleagues, expectant parents and a bossy boss? What is it she would really want to tell from the very depth of her guts? What kind of emotions are there?
It is wise to be protective of our feelings; we don’t need to act on them or advertise them and neither suppress them. But nobody teaches us how to take care of this inner world full of changes, intensity, pressure and constant motion. Feelings expressed are judged, feelings suppressed become a problem. So how to approach them?
You know my recommendation: meditation. In meditation you can rest and allow for all feelings; meditation gives you a safe space to feel what you feel without censure. It will show you your true value and make you truly strong.