Costa Women Blogs

The plethora of holiday ads offering tempting summer deals can’t compete with birthdays and New Years topping up my tan in winter sunspots, a ticket to tranquillity… Gunjur Beach, Gunjur, Gambia Djembe drumming at the Pacific’s edge, deserted during my month-long stay with a friend, one week in a 4-star beach hotel then eco-huts, soul food and more drumming deep in the jungle. Sinquerim Beach, Goa, India A peaceful, deserted part of the Arabian Sea, comfy sunbeds and fresh coconut juice on tap, three wonderful weeks. Constant background music didn’t bother me, but bothered the ex!  Sámara Beach, Sámara, Costa Rica Barely a soul around apart from a couple of sport fishing boats, emerging from my Pacific swim was a Halle Berry moment, what a pretty picture she is… Sunrise Beach (Haad Rin Nok), Koh Phangan, Thailand Mango salad for breakfast, water volleyball in the Gulf by day (easier than it sounds), Full Moon Parties by night, green curry prawns day AND night! Hurghada Beach, Hurghada, Egypt With windsurfing partner and tour group hanging out for warm breezes to blow their way, I swung in my hammock, swam in the Red Sea, back to hammock, book… Prainha Beach, Rio de Janeiro, Brazil On overcast January days, few ventured to this quieter part of the city, ideal for simply gazing over the Atlantic, and conversations in broken Spanish with Portuguese-speaking bar staff. Venice Beach, Los Angeles, California You stand out on the Pacific boardwalk if you’re not roller-skating backwards, wearing the teeniest pink bikini, or cradling a cutely bow-tied pet pooch – and that’s just the guys! Bondi Beach, Sydney, Australia Bit too crowded to call it relaxing, but cool sipping smoothies higher up the hill looking down on the Pacific’s picture-postcard landmark. Arenal Beach, Jávea, Spain Twenty-five years ago, my first January in Spain, a welcoming 20°C, big shock. Out of the Med rather than in it, a great place to amble along the seaside, meeting point for eating, drinking and dancing. Virgin Gorda, Spanish Town, British Virgin Islands Heart of the tropics, I did a double-take sailing into this Caribbean harbour, stunning is an understatement. Someone below deck asked, “Is it hot?” Doh.   Caribbean, Here We Come! www.amazon.com/TALES-FROM-THE-TOWER-Caribbean-ebook/dp/B00X4NF0ZA © Chris Dove   dovechris1@gmail.com   Twitter @dovechris1

Word “meditation” is sometimes replaced by “sitting”. A posture one takes to meditate is really not so important, but obviously the easiest and most comfortable one is sitting. So instead of saying I meditate one can say I sit.   When I meet my friends for a chat I usually meet them at a cup of coffee or a lunch and we are sitting having a talk. Meditation is a meeting with my-self and it can as well be done in a sitting position. So if there is something I want to attend to, pay special attention to, something that bothers me or need special consideration I sit with it, paying attention and listening as if I was listening to an important, close friend. There is a difference though; I have a conversation with a friend using a verbal language, a language we both understand and my intelligent, thinking mind is in command of it. I cannot do it meditating because in that case the verbal language is an obstacle. I need to use and communicate in non-verbal way being present with what is in the here and now.  When I sit in meditation I am with my being and the being talks in sensations and feelings which appear in the body. I start by scanning the body; witnessing its state and functions (like breathing for example). I listen to motions and sensations occurring in the body and I discern them. This is non-verbal language used by my nervous system. I have been learning it for some time now and it is fascinating. I can sit with anxiety and listen to it; I can sit with worry, fear, doubt and irritation and listen to it. Listening in that case is heeding the energy in my body, feeling whatever is being communicated with an attitude of allowing and accepting. I allow it to express itself without judgement, to tell the whole, uncensored truth. And I do absolutely nothing about it. That’s meditation.

THE EYE OF THE FALCON Book two in the al-Andalus series The first of the al-Andalus series was The Shining City, a novel about the ruined city of Madinat al Zahra, in the year 948 AD. I never really intended to write a series of books; I thought that The Shining City – the first book I wrote about Moorish Spain – could stand very well on its own as a novel about life in Spain at that time. However, when I began researching what little information there was about 10th century Spain, I realised that there was more than one story there. Al-Rahman III’s reign had been a time of peace and prosperity, which could have continued for a hundred years or more, except for the greed of one man, al-Mansur. His lust for power turned him from a humble civil servant into the ruler of al-Andalus and brought about the eventual disintegration of the Omayyad dynasty.  A number of events coincided to give al-Mansur his opportunity. The caliph Abd al-Rahman III, who had brought peace to a warring kingdom of princedoms and united them into a caliphate, died after ruling for forty years. His son, al-Hikam, did not survive him for very long and the throne passed to the hands of his grandson, al-Hisham II, a boy of eleven. And herein lay another story. How was a child going to rule such a wealthy country, especially as it was surrounded by enemies?  So that was when I decided to write a second book The Eye of the Falcon. Falcons and other birds of prey were very important symbols in ancient times of a ruler’s power and wealth and they feature quite prominently in this novel – hence the title of the book. Visiting ambassadors to the court would bring the rarest and most expensive birds as gifts to impress the caliph. When I started the first draft of the book, I intended to make the boy-caliph the main character, but the fact that he was so isolated made it difficult for him to interact with the other characters in the story. So I made his mother, Subh, the main character instead, because she moves between her son and al-Mansur, who is not only the boy’s Regent but also her lover. So Subh is constantly torn between her passion for al-Mansur and her loyalty to her son.  Subh was originally a slave who was sold into the harem of  al-Hikam II. The only problem was that al-Hikam was homosexual – not an unusual occurrence among the elite at that time – and it seemed that he was never going to produce an heir. With the encouragement of al-Hikam’s mother, Subh set out to seduce him by dressing up as a boy. The ruse worked and eventually she gave him two sons. In doing so, she became rich and powerful. There is a saying that truth is often stranger than fiction and, in this case, I think it is very true. That the most powerful and richest ruler in the Western world could be isolated and deprived of his birthright because of his age seems unbelievable, yet it happened. That a concubine was able to dress as a boy in order to seduce the homosexual caliph, also seems very far-fetched, but it happened. Not all of the characters in my novel were real people but the main ones were. The caliphs existed, as did al-Mansur, General Ghálib and others in the government. Subh was a real woman, a slave from the north of Spain, and is recorded as not only being the mother of al-Hakim’s two sons but also rumoured to be the mistress of al-Mansur. However there was little information available about her life before she entered the harem, so her back story is fiction. Al-Jundi and his family are fictitious characters who started life in the first book, The Shining City. As is frequently the case with history, what information there is about people living in the past usually relates to the rich and powerful. Servants, slaves and artisans are hardly ever mentioned by name. If Subh had not given birth to the Caliph’s sons we would never have heard of her either. Consequently all the supporting characters, soldiers, servants, slaves, falconers etc are fictitious. Having said that, the question is how much of the novel is fact and how much is fiction? Of course the story is fiction – it is after all a novel – but there is written evidence that Al-Mansur was a ruthless man, who usurped the young caliph and became the supreme ruler of al-Andalus. It is true that he fought many battled against the Christians, conducting a jihad against Christianity. Many deaths were attributed to his lust for power, but a lot of it was, and is, speculation. He is however, recorded as having burnt thousands of the city’s books – a loss from which al-Andalus never recovered.  

First published in International Coaching News – 12th Edition http://www.international-coaching-news.net/ICNOnlineMagazine     As most Life Coaches know, when a client says, “I don’t really know what I want in life…I just want to be happy”, we can feel stumped.  Traditional Life Coaching can only, by its very nature, help someone reach a clearly definable and measureable goal – and ‘being happy’ is neither of those.  So what can the coach do? Try to discover, through deep questioning, what is missing in the client’s life, what would make them bounce out of bed with joy each morning, what is it they cannot get through day without dreaming about? With Transpersonal Life Coaching, this dilemma is tackled from many angles. ‘Transpersonal’ can be said to be another word for holistic which, in essence, means to address the whole person from all three perspectives: mind, body and spirit.  Transpersonal Life Coaching helps to guide and develop the psychological, physiological and spiritual aspects of people’s lives to enable them to work through their blocks, to thereby achieve success and accomplish their desired results in spite of their issues. In the first coaching session, clients will often struggle to express their deepest desires, perhaps after a lifetime of suppressing them.  But, after having had explained how the many tools in the Transpersonal Coaching Toolbox work to help them, they can and do go forward to achieve everything they want, having been inspired and empowered to find and live their passion in a context of love and joy and an absence of fear. First and foremost, Transpersonal Life Coaching is for anyone who wants more out of life while maintaining their spiritual integrity.  They will discover how to grow, thrive and bring some magic back into their lives, while actively nourishing their spiritual selves. Heart-based entrepreneurs respond well to Transpersonal Life Coaching; these business people are often called ‘Innerpreneurs’ within the marketing profession.  An Innerpreneur will use their business to find personal fulfillment – creatively, spiritually, emotionally – and create social change. Innerpreneurs (also called Cultural Creatives) have traits that are very compatible with the concepts behind Transpersonal Life Coaching. These defining entrepreneurial traits are: •           high need for independence •           high need for achievement •           low need for conformity •           high need to take personal responsibility •           propensity for risk-taking •           passion for spotting opportunities •           passion for expressing their ideas   But Innerpreneurs are characteristically different, as they start businesses as vehicles to aid in their own personal growth rather than that of a company’s. They start their businesses so they can find personal fulfillment and satisfaction through their work.  They are driven by their need to realize their full potential, to make a difference and to constantly learn and evolve. Basically, they desire to use business to improve the world and themselves.  Transpersonal Life Coaching helps them find their path and sets them confidently on their way. http://www.international-coaching-news.net/ICNOnlineMagazine      Clients are often surprised how quickly & easily they move through their issues & challenges once they start coaching with Jean. As an Intuitive & an Empath, she has developed the ability to work deeply & connectedly with individuals & groups, encouraging & motivating them to bring out the best in themselves. Her strengths are communication of all forms & at all levels; the ability to instigate & promote an idea or concept & inspire others; versatility & adaptability; high creative energy; an analytical & enquiring mind & an ability to work on her own initiative or as part of a team. Based in southern Spain, Jean works online & in-person with clients & divides her time between Marbella, Barcelona & London. www.jeangilhead.com

I have a dream. But there was a time in my life when I didn’t allow myself to dream; it was too silly, unpractical and above all completely unrealistic. But now I know that a dream has nothing to do with reality. A dream is not about fulfilling it; it is about having it. So I just allow myself to dream. Everything that is not nature, had been once dreamed, imagined, longed for by somebody. Everything that belongs to civilization and culture and not to nature was once somebodies dream.   We put pressure and expectations on a dream, a judgement of its values. We forget that before any dream is brought up to a physical existence it has to occur first; has to take shape in the imagination of its keeper, has to come and pay a visit to its host. And if the doors are closed and there is no permission for it to be, if it is suppresses and judged and controlled from the very start it turns the life of its keeper into some sad, suppressed and constricted one. It has to be welcomed, held and cherished first even if the thinking, logical mind falls about learning about it, ridicules and dismisses it. Before it is judged and criticized let it show up first.   I vote for allowing dreams to exist even if they will never, ever come to life. I vote for dreams of various sizes and qualities to be noticed, listened to and entertained. I vote for allowing them to come and go, grow or fade, simply exist. I don’t need to attach myself to them, or pursue them like a lunatic. I just want to have some space in my life for dreams, visions and ideas: the ordinary one as well as crazy and impossible one. The possibility of allowing my-self to dream brings feeling of freedom and liberty into my life. And this very act of allowing a dream may simply show me a direction that my logical, thinking mind is not able to see, is too limited to perceive. So I sit with my dream; I meditate on it. I don’t burden it with any expectations and rules; I enjoy it. I allow it to be.

Women feature in only 26% of online news and tweets, according to the Global Media Monitoring Project (GMMP) in its latest analysis of 114 countries. It finds women are LESS visible today as story subjects and reporters than in their 2010 report, with its ongoing aim to extinguish media sexism by 2020. Those who know me have heard me bang on about this, pointing a brightly painted red fingernail in the direction of SUR in English. By cruel coincidence only a fortnight ago, a male letter writer praised the paper for the pleasure he receives reading weekly contributions by four male reporters, cheerfully ending, “Thanks, guys.” Nuff said. Page 5 of GMMP’s Spain report (note typo!) says women have made “no significant advance” in the digital compared to traditional spheres, averaging 33% online and tweeting; “of the daily total not exceeding 50% in any subject. Increased presence is in celebrity news, media arts and sports.” Serious subjects – politics, science, health – trail woefully behind. GMMP España http://cdn.agilitycms.com/who-makes-the-news/Imported/reports_2015/national/Spain.pdf info@prowriteandedit.com @dovechris1 Image: Invisible Woman courtesy Marvel/Wikispaces