Costa Women Blogs

  If you are a paper addict like me, you will be excited to hear that we have our second Costa Women Planner ready for 2020. The planner will help you plan, organise and make a commitment to create your best year ever.  Amazing years don’t just happen by chance; we are the ones who need to work to ‘make it happen’. The Planner contains some major upgrades on last year’s edition, including a new diary design, improved paper, loads more tools and useful ideas to help you roar into the twenties! In the Planner pages, I have shared some rituals that work for me and will help moving your vision and dream to a clear map and plan for the future so you can create it.   The Costa Women 2020 Planner is available for just 24,95€ (including IVA, plus postage) (pre-print offer has now expired) Order your ‘limited edition’ 2020 planner now and let’s make 2020 happen together.  Email: planner@costawomen.com   To find out more about the Planner and the 2020 improvements read on…   The Story of this Planner   Over the years, I have indulged sampling different diaries, planners and journals from small slim Letts style, through the filofax range and onto one that was bigger than my handbag!  I love paper products. At the end of 2017, with my creative juices flowing, I decided that I needed to create a planner that was more personal and ticked more of the boxes for what I actually wanted and needed. And I decided to share it!   We live in such a digital age and I am known for my love of Social Media so why do I want to use paper and pens?  For me, to write things down; thoughts, ideas, goals, dreams, things I am grateful for, plans, experiences – these all brings an excitement about how I will be filling my days.  Writing by hand connects your brain and thoughts to the words you are writing making it a powerful process.     I consider every single day to be the single most important day in the history to forever, so far.   2019 was my first exciting foray into creating Planners. It was such fun being able to make and use something and I loved your feedback. The Planner is going to include some of the things I have learnt and use as well as ideas the Planners found worked for them.    The Planner   The Costa Women 2020 Planner has been designed by the female, solopreneur / small business owner in mind; the woman who wants some daily positivity as well as some time saving tips, inspiration and advice.  It’s contains simple, effective tools to empower you to take charge of your life and we have a Facebook group to keep you on target. The planner has been created to connect, inspired, enable and support you in your journey.       What’s inside? (sample pages)            A5 – spiral bound (we have upgraded the paper and the cover so it’s easier to write on and more durable for carrying around).  Recycled paper 120g that can be coloured and written on. Cover 350g plastified – (last year was 250g)     With over 240 pages there are sheets for:- Year to view layouts (2020/2021) Increased size for 2020 for your week-to-view including planning layouts with space for:- to do list positive quote things you are grateful for your achievements     Included are some signifiers (bullets) that you can include to make your week planning easier (we do love learning new ways to see our week).   Each month has a theme and contains Planning tools:- The One Big thing you will achieve Commitment to how you are working towards your goals *new Social Media Ideas and call to action *revised from 2019 Your monthly financial goals and achievements *new End of Month Evaluation Space for journaling   There are also pages for:- Learning from 2019 Grateful for from 2019 Balance wheel – where you are now and where you want to be I am ready to make 2020 my year (Goals area) Word for 2020 My secret wish *new In 2020 I will… Network Exercise / Sphere of Influence Annual Social Media Exercise Yearly evaluation Parked Ideas 50 Things to do in 2021 7 Habits of a Highly Effective Woman Mood Tracker Books to read My Favourite Affirmations *new   And for the creative there are 4 colouring pages too designed by Sarah Houldcroft of Goldcrest Books   And a Facebook Group And that’s not all!  You will also get free access to a Facebook group that will be an extension of the planner which brings it to life and gives you a place to share experiences, tips and tricks as well as some extra bonuses including online events with ‘experts’ talking about the planner’s theme for the month.   ‘If you talk about it, it’s a dream, if you envision it, it’s possible, but if you schedule it, it’s real.” – Anthony Robbins   The limited edition A5 planner is available to order for 19,95€ including IVA and plus postage before 16 October. Once they are sold out, they are gone!   Email planner@costawomen.com to reserve your limited edition copy.   The price will increase to 24,95€ from 17th October. I’m super excited about the prospect of 2020 (our 10th anniversary year!) and hope you are too!   Ali x

Meet Leigh Shulman; writer, mentor, coach and believer that now could be the time to tell your story!  And when you are ready, Leigh will help you find your roadmap too Hello Leigh – please introduce yourself I’m Leigh Shulman! I’m a life long writer and traveler.  I’m the author of The Writer’s Roadmap: Paving the Way To Your Ideal Writing Life. This book is based on almost a decade working with writers as they create a plan for their writing lives and make it happen. I’m currently working on my next book. This book is for my daughter! It’s a YA sci-fi book I began during NaNoWrimo. When I told my daughter about it, she told me I had to finish it because she wanted to reading.  When I’m not writing, I run my writing mentorship community called The Workshop. It offers you the tools, community support and accountability you need to make your writing dreams come true. My writing has appeared in publications from Business Insider to Longreads to The Washington Post and Longreads among others.   Tell us why you are thinking of moving to Spain! I visited Barcelona and Seville a couple years ago and fell in love with it. I found Costa Women around that time, too. It’s my dream to begin a series of writing retreats in Spain. (I used to hold them in Costa Rica and Nicaragua, but when I visited Spain, I knew I wanted to host them there.) Barcelona was amazing. From the art to the food to exploring the streets. I can’t wait to go back.  Seville blew me away. It’s so beautiful. Each corner more breathtaking than the next. We drove down to Estepona on the coast to visit my cousin who was living there. What a life! How did your writing journey start?When I was 12. I was pissed off about something — I can’t remember what — and I started writing and just kept going and going. I loved it! I wrote my school paper. Wrote stories. And just kept going.   Watch the video of our interview here What were your roadblocks? How did you deal with them? Lack of confidence and procrastination. The first leads pretty directly to the second. Lack of confidence is the number one reason most people don’t write. What if my writing is bad? What if no one wants to read what I say?  It’s amazing how many excuses we find that get in the way of writing. I block time in my calendar for writing and then I sit down to write no matter what. It doesn’t matter what I wrote or how good it is or whether or not some imaginary reader may or may not read it… I simply have to sit down and put words on the page. The various ways I move past blocks is the basis of The Workshop. This is a group specifically for people who are talented and capable, they just don’t always realize it. Maybe because they don’t have support. Or because they’ve never had writing classes and feel they need them. Or any other reason we have for not putting words on paper.   And you have created a roadmap – tell us more?My roadmap includes teaching and writing. They go hand in hand for me. This year, I’ve stopped taking private clients so I can focus on my own writing — my book, articles and stories — as well as on The Workshop. It’s exhilarating watching people figure out what they want for their writing and then grow into their goals. The community aspect is favorite part of the group, because it gives me a chance to really get to know what people are doing! You also learn so much more when you have the support and accountability of a group of like minded writers. The retreats I mentioned in Spain… They’re a little bit down the line, but in my vision, these are the face-to-face, have a glass of wine and relax part of the writing community. It’s exciting and inspiring.   What would be your top tip for anyone thinking about writing their own story? Just start writing. I have some worksheet to share with you so you can get started. One for fiction and one for non-fiction.  Then my second best tip is to find a community to support you while you write. (It’s the reason I started The Workshop in the first place, bc I know it works.)   In your book ‘The Writers Roadmap” you said “I do believe we get stuck, and often we’re stuck because we’re doing something we’ve never done before. So being stuck can actually be a sign of growth.”  What would be your advice when Women think they are stuck (whether writing, or in life)? My best writing advice applies to most other areas of life too. Try something. If it doesn’t work. Try something else. Feeling stuck is normal. No one learned to walk or ride a bike without falling. When we see a child learning a new skill, we encourage them to keep going. Yet when we get stuck, we assume we’re terrible and no one will ever want to read what we’ve written. When you begin to recognize that stuck feeling as a sign that you’re growing, it makes it easier to keep going.   Do you have any bad habits when you write? Not really. Not anymore. I used to write late at night and it messed up my sleeping. I also used to smoke. So imagine me sitting up late with a cup of espresso and a constantly burning cigarette. Good for writing. Bad for me. I’ve spent a lot of time moving away from my bad habits. How can we set boundaries?The best way to set a boundary I find is to figure out what you need to sustain yourself, to feel good in your body in mind, to feel happy with your day to day, and then do it. In the method of creating a writing plan I describe in The Writer’s Roadmap, I include what I call core values. Things like time with family, feeling healthy, enjoying what we’re doing, travel. They mean we enjoy our work and lives in general. Your boundaries with other people flow naturally from there. What gets you into the creative zone? Reading. Reading Reading. (See hero authors above.) Also dancing, yoga, hiking…. basically anything that gets me away from my computer and out of my head. If something doesn’t fit into what you want and your core values, then you say no. Who is your writing hero (or heroine) and why? So many. But currently, Chuck Wendig is top of my mind bc I just saw him speak in Atlanta. His ability to write A LOT and also the way he connects with his audience.  I’m reading his new book and LOVING it. Also.. Ann Patchet. Lydia Yuknavitch. Stephanie Land. Anne Lamott. What will you achieve over the summer? My main goal is to finish the current (almost final) draft of my book. I am waving my magic make it happen wand – what dream can we make a reality? I’d love for my next launch of the Workshop to go super smoothly and easily. Actually, I’d love for everything to feel easier. Juggling so many things — family, work, kids, myself — takes so much energy.  My goal is to remove the stress and self flagelation that too often goes along with it. And just feel more mellow about everything. How can we connect with you after this interview? Come and connect with me via leighshulman.com and download your five steps to start writing your non-fiction book here. When you sign up for this free resource, I’ll e-mail you from my personal e-mail address, and you can hit reply to write me! I respond whenever someone writes me! Thank you Leigh!

Toe pain comes in many different forms and with some fabulous titles: Hammer Toes Mallet Toes Claw Toe Bunions Morton’s Neuroma Metatarsalgia Gout Rheumatoid Arthritis And don’t each of those sound hideously painful and terribly terminal?! What they have in common All of these conditions have different triggers and impacts on the toes and feet. But there are a few things they all have in common: They change the shape of your toes – instead of lying nice and flat at the end of your foot they bend and twist They make shoes uncomfortable – because shoes are designed for toes that lie flat! Especially anything that might be called “pretty” or “stylish”! They make your toes and toe joints inflamed and swollen – especially where they rub up against your shoes! NONE of them are caused by “too tight” shoes / heels – although wearing them right now is probably really uncomfortable! Bones, Nerves and Blood There are three broad categories of things that cause toe pain: Foot Anatomy Hammer Toes, Mallet Toes, Claw Toe, Bunions These are all conditions which start to affect how the small bones of the toes and feet “sit” together. Toes start to look twisted or out of place, they bend or curl over. Toes rub against shoes because they are out of alignment.   Nerve inflammation and too much pressure Morton’s Neuroma and Metatarsalgia Excess pressure on the ball of the foot cause irritation of the nerves (Morton’s Neuroma) or swelling and irritation in the area (Metatarsalgia)   Other conditions Gout and Rheumatoid Arthritis can also cause pain, swelling and joint changes, particularly at the base of the big toe. These are conditions that cause system wide joint changes but can be particularly uncomfortable in the feet. What to do about it With all of the conditions mentioned toe pain is a SYMPTOM of the problem. And as I have said again and again and AGAIN over the last decade – you can get all the most amazing treatment in the world but if you are only treating the symptom not the cause, you won’t make the progress you expect. So here’s what you can do – Short term There are some wonderful tapes and gadgets which help your toes feel more comfortable. Use them if they help! There’s no point suffering if a 5€ gadget makes you more comfortable right now. Start Now Do your toe exercises! I’ve put them up on my website and Facebook page. Start doing them today Long term Take the pressure off the toes and the structures in the foot that lead up to the toes. Reduce the swelling in the toes themselves so you are comfortable enough to do your exercises. That means professional help! Orthotics and orthopaedic shoes are no longer ugly or large (at least, they don’t have to be!). There are lots of options so find the one that fits your foot and your life! For foot exercises and more information about toe and foot pain check out our website www.TheBodyworksClinic.com, our Facebook page “Bodyworks Health Clinic” or call us on 952 883 151

    We are all so fortunate to be living now, experiencing Human life in all its physical, emotional, mental and spiritual facets. It is a time of great change… a great awakening… for Humankind to remember the truth of who each truly is… powerful and magnificent Divine light and loving beings having a Human experience.   AND knowing this truth, each can be excited and celebrate life, no matter the circumstances… allowing the love we each are to absorb our pain, struggle and limitation and consciously choose our next sovereign adventure that brings about peace and harmony within, our loved ones and on Earth!   Now its summer and Tom and I decided to travel with our car again to visit our family and friends in England and Holland… You can enjoy our journey with us and take in the beautiful surroundings we enjoyed.   Travelling through Spain and France to visit family & friends in England & Holland…     Discovering great new places and b&b’s for our overnight stay…   Exploring Hardwick Hall & Gardens in Derbyshire…   Feeling right at home in the grounds of this grand home of the late Elisabeth Cavendish and Countess of Shrewsbury…   Enjoying gardening in my mums garden…   Grateful for the sunny days we experienced in England and chance for some good love time with mum & dad…   A garden of beauty, fruit & veg at Breck Farm, Kniveton, Derbyshire   Someone has green fingers…   Beauty just doesn’t stop showing itself here, a great family farm where I grew up in Derbyshire…   Celebrating the life of all the one’s who served Britain and died for our freedom… Thankyou!   Visiting family & friends in Holland… It rained!   Celebrating the abundance of beautiful flowers, nature, good food, wine and loved ones…   There’s nothing like a good giggle…   Travelling back home through France & Spain, re-visiting great places to stay…   It’s been another pleasure to explore Europe with our car and celebrate life this summer…   Barbara Franken… Creative Visionary & Master CreatorInspiring New Energy Consciousness & Multi-Dimensional Living A paperback and Digital Book is available from all Major online stores… Amazon and Apple.  I share my own magical journey, exploring Who I AM with the help of nine Elemental Beings and expand from a world of fear, struggle and limitation into a New Energy Consciousness of love, grace and freedom. It is in this loving space that I discover my Divine and ALL LOVING self and allow myself to integrate together as one Body Consciousness… a DivineHumanBeing… and Magnificent Master Creator who expresses and creates heart and soul passion on the physical plane and beyond..    Join my MasterCreator Class and emerge yourself in the celebration of life through dance, song, art, relaxed inner journeys and beyond everything known… preparing yourself for your NEW role on New Earth.   There is no time like the present moment to Sign Up and give YOURSELF this magnificent gift… More Info: MasterCreator Class   All the money raised from my books and classes go to my non-profit association The Magnificent Consciousness that holds free local projects in Benalmadena, Spain.

Meet Maaret Auvinen, originally from Finland now living in Mijas. Maaret is a people person in more ways than one and is now using her skills with horses to help people reconnect with themselves.    Why Spain? I moved here 12 years ago with my family for health reasons. The last winter in Finland with all the eczemas and asthma was too much and the next summer when we visited Fuengirola, as we had done for years, we decided to stay.   Where do you live in Spain?  Give us three reasons why we should move there too! I live in Mijas, which is a big area ranging from beautiful, peaceful, natural mountain area to the busy coastal area with one of the best and most popular tourist spots on the Costa del Sol. Mijas is the best place to live as the town hall really wants their citizens to feel at home there. Also, the vast range of different opportunities for business and pleasure is worth moving to Mijas.   Now you have brought your people skills to Spain – tell us how your story to your current career? I am economist and have been an entrepreneur for almost 20 years. I first started helping friends out in getting finance, writing business plans, helping them with marketing plans etc. Very soon I noticed that most of the business problems are personal ones. Hence, I started studying life coaching and the conscious and subconscious mind. The ability to understand the mind really raised my ability to help people to an amazing level.  Along the years I have developed a useful toolkit to help people in their professional and personal lives.   Let’s talk about ‘How we Ruin Your Own Success’ (read the article here)  This article was born through frustration of seeing people waste their talent and resources, and the need to help as many people as possible. When I wrote this article I was working as a team manager and project manager at the same time in a telemarketing company. Telemarketing is very demanding and really shows what people are made of and gives perfect examples how people can sabotage their success. Being succesful is all about having a clear mind, self-knowledge and ability to take responsibility of one’s life.   What do you believe is the biggest challenge to people working in today’s world? The stress and most of all the need to be stressed out – like it defines our importance. People have no time to really calm down, relax and have time for themselves or their families. This leads to all kinds of health problems ranging from emotional to physical problems.   Your own biggest challenge (whether business or personal) and what did you do to overcome it? My biggest challenge is always myself. And this is the case with everybody else. We are all the root of our biggest problems in one way or another. I think my biggest challenge is my shyness. I am an introvert by nature and shyness doesn’t really help the situation. Singing and being on stage have been my biggest help to overcome this. I started as a lead singer of an international vocal group when I was nine years old.  I make sure I am on stage to sing or talk to people regularly to keep my shyness in control.   How are you using your voice now? 1) To express myself as I tend to bottle up my feelings. The biggest award is being on stage, connect with the crowd and make them feel a vide range of feelings, but mostly help them feel great. So, I use my voice to feel better and also heal myself and people around me – be it on stage or on vocal lessons or vocal therapy. This leads to the second part of voice use: one can calm down and ease both emotional and physical pain using one´s voice. 3) The teaching: Nothing feels better than a person finding the joy of singing and seeing how she or he grows as a singer. 4) Singing is a great way to connect with animals.   You also have a passion for horses – when did that start? I always wanted to ride a horse. As a child, my mom couldn’t afford riding lessons. Then I was too busy first with my career and then with my business and family. Although, I did have clients with horses with behavioural problems throughout the years, but I never ride the horses, only solved their problems. 2 years ago I decided it was time to really learn how to ride and here I am connecting the dots of my past and the present in my new business.   At Finca la Ventilla you are using animals to help people reconnect with themselves.  Tell us more Farm animals are very sensitive beings – they feel everything you do. If you are scared, they are, if you feel love they receive and give it unconditionally. Especially a horse helps a person to remember how to feel all the range of emotions in a safe environment, how to be sensitive and how to trust again, how to give love and receive love. A horse also teaches one tough love, which is setting boundaries with love. Finca is a safe place to reconnect with yourself -whether you’re a hardcore business person, a child, pensioner, disabled, etc.       Favourite quote and why? ”Mä teen, mitä mä haluan ja muut tekee, mitä ne osaa.” = ”I do what I want, and other people do what they are able to do.” This is something my mom taught me. My childhood was difficult and this always helped me in challenging situations for two reasons: 1) As a child I knew at least one person (my mom) believed in me and 2) It helped me to trust in myself and to do what I had to do as no other person cannot do that for me. Sometimes I still find strength from within with this quote.   Something you will achieve over the summer? Getting my new business running and successful. I can already see that we got Finca la Ventilla filled with human and animal clients by this Autumn.   The person you would most like to horse ride, or sing with and why? Both – riding and singing with Irene Cara. She was my idol growing up and still is – many times when I have learned about a musical I like, she has had something to do with it. She comes from a modest home. She fought her way to fame against racial and gender odds. She is very talented in many fields – and she is known to have a passion for horseback riding.   If you were starting over again, what would you do differently? That is a complicated question as we are formed by our past actions. Changing one thing could result in a totally different me. However, if there is one thing, I would change no matter what it would change in me, I would change this: I would always have gone for my goals for me and not for anyone else.   What book will you never give away? That is a difficult one. Two are at the top: the first one, which taught me how to understand myself very well and not be ashamed of myself is “The Highly Sensitive Person” by Ellen N. Aaron, PhD. The other one, which I just recently discovered is “When The Body Says No” by Gabor Maté. This book has helped me to understand more profoundly why I created an illness called fibromyalgia in my body.   How do we find out more about the Finca and connect with you? You can find us on Facebook: Finca la Ventilla – Centro de Equitación y Bienestar. Unfortunately, I do not have my webpage yet, but it will be out soon. One can also contact me on LinkedIn with my name Maaret Auvinen. Or find my website maaret.es  

  When I first came across this particular ‘disorder’ it was one of those times when I truly believed we could all be diagnosed with some disorder or another. Of course adjustment, or change of situation can be difficult, but can it truly be classed as a mental health disorder?    Whilst I don’t necessarily subscribe to the medical model for all psychiatric conditions, I have come to realise, since living in another country that adjustment disorder is extremely prevalent, and potentially very dangerous if not treated correctly.   From a previous experience, I dreamed for years of living in a hot climate in Europe, and bringing my daughter up at a more gentle and slower pace with longer daylight hours. I imagined I would transport my UK life to Spain and I would work, learn the language and integrate into the community. That was 16 years ago, and cutting a long story short it didn’t work out like that. I had to return back to the UK, but it was definitely the best and right option. I had not approached the move in a sensible and fully informed way. I came back this time with the benefit of hindsight. I knew that jobs were scarce and that I would need to retrain in a career that I could take with me. I knew I had trouble learning languages, so I had to accept that it was not going to be easy to integrate into Spanish culture. I accepted that it has quite a transient community, so making long term friends can be a challenge. To begin a new life in another country it is quite important, I think, to make connections with people who speak your native language, if only to negotiate the necessary paperwork to get you started.     So what is adjustment disorder exactly? According to the book (DSM5 psychiatry.org) which is used to classify mental health disorders by medical professionals, adjustment disorder is defined as: ‘the presence of emotional or behavioural symptoms in response to an identifiable stressor(s) occurring within 3 months of the onset of the stressor(s)’ (American Psychiatric Association, 2013 ). So for example, if a person moves to Spain and within 3 months and their emotions and behaviour begin to change and stress, depression or general anxiety related symptoms occur, it could be as a result of adjustment disorder. However, most of the time, the symptoms disappear within 6 months.   In the UK we might go to seek out help from our GP initially if we were experiencing stress as a result of life changing events, such as divorce, a house move etc, we might then be referred on to a therapist.      But where do we even start in an unfamiliar country? For one thing, counselling and psychotherapy is not practiced in Spain by Spanish mental health experts, nor is it even recognised as a profession. The Spanish very much use a medical model and if you were suspected of being stressed, anxious or depressed it is very likely that you would be given an appointment with a psychologist or psychiatrist. You might then leave with a handful of psychiatric medication and possibly a mental health diagnosis to go with them. Believe me, getting labelled is far easier than you might imagine. Having that label subsequently removed is another matter altogether.    To me this is all very alarming, because whilst I agree that medication and mental health labelling are helpful for some people (in time and after other interventions have been exhausted), is it a good option from the outset? I don’t believe so. For example, if the symptoms of adjustment disorder occur after around 3 months and then settle down after 6, surely it is not the best idea to put someone on psychiatric medication for something that might right itself after 12 weeks.     Another danger of adjustment disorder is the temptation to self medicate for the symptoms. You find yourself in a new country, in an area that is a holiday destination and you are lonely. Why would a local bar not become a place to meet up with potential new friends and acquaintances? But what about when that becomes a habit? I would imagine that 3 months of drinking every night, whilst it might not necessarily make someone an alcoholic, it would certainly lead to habitual drinking and the potential later on for an addiction to develop. It is a known scientific fact that alcohol is a depressant, so therefore it figures that the symptoms of depression could also be exacerbated.   Perhaps as alarming is the person who tries to do the right thing and visits a Psychiatrist because they are feeling low, lonely, and sad due to trying to integrate into a new country and culture. They are then quite likely to be given medication that can be either highly addictive, or will take 6 weeks to get into the system before results are measurable. These medications when taken with alcohol can be extremely dangerous and potentially life threatening. So the potential for a comorbid addiction and mental health issue to exist becomes increasingly higher.      What should you do if you feel depressed, anxious, lonely, isolated or stressed due to the adjustment of moving here? Or perhaps you know of someone who is displaying symptoms of struggling with such a big life change? As a therapist I am reluctant to give advice but I would suggest that the first port of call be to reach out to people who have been here for a long time and live lives that are very conventional. This is a holiday destination but if you want to live here it will become your home, not a permanent holiday. Don’t seek out friends in bars, by all means go to bars with friends but don’t be fooled into thinking long term meaningful friendships might be formed there. Give yourself and others some time, I would say a minimum of 12 weeks to find your feet and to begin to establish a safe network of acquaintances.   Reach out to good people. Costa Women (costawomen.com) for example has many members who have lived here in Spain very successfully for lots of years. There are endless meetings and forums whereby women can help, advise, signpost, meet up for coffee, lunch etc. Reach out and talk to people, you might be very surprised to find that a lot of them might have experienced the exact same situation as yourself.    karenrhodestherapy.com