Wine & Cupcakes….
Last Wednesday night I wanted to either drink a bottle of wine or go face first into a chocolate cake…
I messaged my friend –
“What do you do when you want to eat your feelings or drink them? Both?”
It was just one of those days where you’re super emotional, for no real reason.
And then I don’t know about you, but I get frustrated with myself for BEING emotional.
I’ve learned to give myself some compassion and grace, but that’s not my normal reaction.
So this blog is not going to be about how I went home and digested my thoughts, fought off the cravings and ate a big salad and then felt immediatley amazing.
Nope. I DID process my thoughts on my drive home.
I thought about WHY I was feeling that way, and honestly I didn’t come up with an answer.
I didn’t do a great job of giving myself compassion, but I gave myself a little.
Then I got home and I did have some wine – 2 glasses….not a whole bottle.
I knew I could muster a little will power, I just knew I didn’t want to white knuckle it and then be miserable.
I was completely okay with giving into some cravings….so I ate the dinner that I had already prepared and it was healthy.
Then after dinner I did eat a cupcake – and it was bloody delicious.
Did it end my crappy feelings?
Not at all…..I still felt it all night, but I gave in to that and was kind of okay with it.
So what’s my point?
It’s two fold actually:
1.) Don’t give into cravings 100% but don’t go 100% crazy on them either- see if you can find a middle ground because when all is said and done, you probably won’t feel better anyway (case in point- me last week).
2.) Know that it’s okay to feel this way. Some fitness professionals and coaches may disagree with my perspective on this because they think you should only tell people to “puch through it” and “think positive”.
That’s BS and you and I both know it.
You will have shitty days. Lean into the feelings a little, eat some cake if it makes you feel better, just make sure you’re acknowledging that that’s not the real answer…….
Do you have an outlet for this type of thing?
A place you can go to feel better, blow off steam, be around positive people?
Louise “I love wine & cupcakes” O’connor
Fitness & Nutrition Coach
3 thoughts on “Wine & Cupcakes”
Hi Louise. Maybe it sounds bold, but next time you feel like that you could come to me for a session of Inner Reconciliation. You are quite right about crappy feelings, they don't go away with positive thinking or even eating a whole creamcake. We usually act on a feeling or suppress it. There is the third way of approaching it and it is turning attantion to it. Since we were not taught how to do it we struggle with them. I teach how to live in peace with our inner world, our "uncontrolable" feelings. I know an outlet. It is a bit like you knowing a lot about food and nutrition, I know how to stop the inner conflict and reconcile the fighting voinces in us. Anyway enjoy the day and enjoy your food. Izabela (Certified Facilitator of Inner Reconcilialtion)
I agree Louise, sometimes it's not healthy to just 'push through' the cravings but 20% of a cupcake sounds good to me 🙂 Great post - thanks!
Yes Louise, I also like your take that it´s all about being conscious about what you´re feeling and what your normal reaction to the bad feeling stuff is. I noticed not that long ago that my own stress response is to want to eat a bag of salty chips. Now I´m more aware of that and stop and say, ohhh it´s because I´m feeling stressed from work, etc. and just that alone kind of diminishes the craving. However, I DID eat those chips sometimes as well! Thanks for your post 🙂
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